Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Randomize