You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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