There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
