If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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