Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
