Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize