Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
