is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Randomize
