He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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