Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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