I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize