You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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