dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
