You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize