"it" just moved
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
