Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
