The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
