Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
