Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
there was a trapeze. enough said
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
