Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
you will always have a special place in my vag
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
