And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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