The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
