took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
