i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
