she was so not down for the gang bang
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
