Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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