you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
