She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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