just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
