she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
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