she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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