I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize