yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
