everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
