You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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