Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Randomize
