i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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