using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
