pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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