anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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