Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize
