i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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