their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
