My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
