just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
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