He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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