I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
