are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize