Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
