from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
